It all Boils Down to Courage- Do You Have What it Takes?

May 30, 2013

Pic-courage-quoteOne of my favorite quotes is “Fall down 7 times, get up 8” by Buddha.  It’s such a subtle quote and so much where I’ve been these past 8 months. I can’t believe I haven’t written since October of last year!  Or maybe I can after I tell you all I’ve been going through—and it really does “all boil down to courage…”

Have you ever had the rug pulled out from under you? Like really pulled hard and you land smack on your rear end in shock of what just happened.  Well that’s what happened to me… My relationship of 12 years ended back in September of 2012, and that was the beginning of the rug pulling.  Then we sold the house in February, and I had to move out and find a place to live, and then I was just simply exhausted from it all.  I had no energy left to work, so I decided to leave the job I was in…  I so just needed to take some time off to get my energy back and just simply take care of me—so that’s what I did.  March 8 I quit the job and took some time just for me.  It had been SOOO long that I took any time for myself, I had no idea what to do.  The good news is it didn’t take me long to figure it out. I traveled to Big Sur and did an amazing workshop at the Esalen Institute on Callings- How to figure out what you really want to do with your life, lead by the inspiring Gregg Levoy. It was life changing, and I traveled to be my family and hiked a ton with my dog and read, and read and read- the library was my “go to” place. (Some of the books I read- Broken Open by Elizabeth Lesser, When the Heart Waits by Sue Monk Kidd, Wishes Fulfilled by Wayne Dyer, Soul Money by Lynn Twist and Sacred Contracts by Carolyn Myss.)

So why am I tell you all of this— there are a few reasons— one, I wanted to share with you why I was absent from my blog, and two, the real reason is I want to inspire you to check in with yourself- to inject you with some courage to look and I mean really look hard at your life, your work, your relationships, your spirituality- Are you fulfilled? Are you happy? Is something missing? Does something need to change?

Do you have what it takes to really give a hard look at your life and have the courage to make the changes you need to live a more fulfilled life?

I know it’s not easy, take it from me, it’s REALLY hard. However, I had a really amazing support system I put into place to help me with all of these changes that happened in my life.  I had an inspiring and gifted therapist, a wonderful coach, and so many supportive friends.   There’s no way I could have made it these past 9 months without them and I’m forever grateful.

So don’t wait until it’s too late, take a good look at your life and make some changes for the better. We all deserve to live a wonderfully, supportive, happy and inspiring life, filled with people who love, care and support us.


5 Steps to Daring Greatly and Living Authentically

September 13, 2012

I was totally shocked when I realized I hadn’t written in my blog since July—yikes! I thought for sure I had written something in August— nope!  So I thought this post would be PERFECT to get me back on track.  It’s interesting how life throws these curve balls at you and even more interesting how you respond.  One thing I know for sure is that life is ALL about CHANGE—you have to simply just expect it and realize you absolutely have NO CONTROL What we need to do is simply prepare ourselves well with riding the waves… And that’s how this post came to be… the 5 Steps to Daring Greatly and Living Authentically…

It’s funny how things happen—because I certainly don’t believe in coincidences…  The whole month of July I was away traveling— only home for 5 days, and they weren’t even consecutive days!  And on my last trip working a very stressful 8 day event a friend showed me a TED (Technology, Entertainment and Design) video by Brene Brown—  it was so PERFECT—I laughed out loud and even dare I say—cried too…  And that’s where this title of  my article came from—Brene Brown who just wrote another book called Daring Greatly, How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead

I was lucky enough to be in the audience to see Brene on the new Katie Couric Show which is premiering this week.  Her focus is on how we can be vulnerable and how this will transform us.  Her background is a researcher and she’s a professor at the University of Houston Graduate College for  Social Work School.  She’s spent years studying, shame, and vulnerability.  She tells her story in the TED video, so check it out I won’t bore you with it here… She also did a follow-up TED talk which was equally inspiring and funny too. Her video is in the top 10 most watched video on TED.

What was even cooler is I was there because a good friend works on the show and surprised me by bringing me backstage to meet her. She was so gracious and as wonderful in person as on the show. They gave us all a copy of her new book, which I had her sign for me and I took a photo with her as well…  This was an inspiring experience for me, one that I will always treasure. I connected with her because she’s so left brained like me- we just want strategies and tools, we don’t want to have to deal with emotions, feelings and being vulnerable- yikes… As an aside—If you catch the episode of Brene, you will see yours truly for my 15 seconds of fame in the show- They did a man on the street and asked me a question—I had to answer the question- I feel vulnerable when…. So check out the show to see more…

Well guess what, this is the key to living a full and joyful life, not numbing or stuffing my feelings, but giving them space.  In fact I started rereading some terrific books by Pema Chodron, Start Where You Are, The Places that Scare You and When Things Fall Apart. All of her books are about being present, meditating and feeling and being with your emotions, but not letting them run your life…

So here in lies the real core message— these are the 5 things I learned from Brene on Daring Greatly and these are the things I’m striving for in my life so I can live it more fully, not matter what challenges I’m facing or going through…

1)    Overcoming Self-doubt

2)    Being more Authentic

3)    Practicing Self-Compassion

4)    Finding More Gratitude and Joy everyday

5)    Nurturing creativity, play and rest

If you can work on mastering one or two of these, you will live a much more joyful and full life. Of course mastering more than one, would be ideal. But you don’t have to be that ambitious, just take one step forward and tackle one of these today and let me know how you do!


What Do Your Customers Really Desire?

May 31, 2012

I wanted to continue my blog from last week where I discussed “What Your Customers Want to Buy,” followed up by this week where the focus is on “What Do Your Customers Desire.”  This questions are incredibly similar because a lot of the focus is out the outcome, not exactly a product or service. Remember people buy on emotion and then they rationalize with logic AFTER they purchase.

That’s why what I’m about to tell you is REALLY cool and important. If you’re a student of Direct Response Marketing or a copywriter, or student of marketing, you’ve probably heard of Victor Schwab. If you haven’t, shame on you- get on Amazon now and buy this book— How To Write A Good Advertisement

In the book he has a ton of terrific stuff on how to write copy and ads that convert. The one thing that caught my eye and made a huge impact on my was on page 47 where he talks about what showing people an advantage, yet it helps when you know what those advantages are.  So here’s his list of people’s desires and what they want to gain, be, do and save:

1) People want to GAIN:

–      Health

–      Time

–      Money

–      Popularity

–      Improved Appearance

–      Security in old age

–      Praise from others

–      Comfort

–      Leisure

–      Proof of Accomplishment

–      Advancement- business, social

–      Increased enjoyment

–      Self-confidence

–      Personal prestige

2) People want to BE:

–      Good Parents

–      Social able and Hospitable

–      Up-to-date

–      Creative

–      Proud of their Possessions

–      Influential over others

–      Gregarious

–      Efficient

–      First in things

–      Recognized as authorities

3) People want to DO:

–      Express their personalities

–      Resist domination over others

–      Satisfy their curiosity

–      Emulate the admirable

–      Appreciate beauty

–      Acquire or collect things

–      Win others affections

–      Improve themselves generally

4) People want to SAVE:

–      Time

–      Money

–      Work

–      Discomfort

–      Worry

–      Doubts

–      Risks

–      Personal Embarrassment

My recommendation of what to do with these lists, is in your marketing promotion and copy, ensure that you tie into these advantages and focus on one or more things of what people want to gain, be, do and save.  And if you can do that, they will buy from you.

I’ll leave you with this terrific quote from Napoleon Hill (and if you don’t know who he is- buy his book here—Think and Grow Rich. It was originally published in 1937) “There are no motives to action: Self-interest and fear.” So to me he’s saying that people buy out of self interest- to gain, be, do and save and out of fear. Hence so much copy is fear driven and focusing on our problems and that’s why everyone has the perfect solution for us because that’s how most of us think.  When asked what we want, it’s easier to know what we don’t want which then gets us to what we want… Happy thinking, discovering and figuring out your customers desires!


Discovering How to Add Some Disney “Mouse” Magic Into Your Business

May 17, 2012

Here are my two favorite quotes from Walt Disney:

“Think beyond your lifetime. If you want to do something truly great. Make a fifty year master plan. A fifty year master plan will change your look at the opportunities in the present.”

“If you can dream it, you can do it!”

These quotes do an awesome job of giving you a birds eye view into Walt’s psyche and how he was able to accomplish so much in a given period of time. He was the epitome of driven and going after his dreams. After reading his book, “How to be like Walt,” I certainly was able to view how when you have a dream, you go after it and let NOTHING stop you or get in your way.

I had the recent pleasure of spending 3 days in Orlando and two of them I spent at Epcot, touring and learning all of what was in Walt’s plan and how his little city in Orlando came to be. It was a fascinating adventure for me.  I got an amazing glimpse into his mind of how he accomplished his dreams and the flip side, of how he wasn’t able to see his dream of his Orlando parks come true. Yet, how his brother Roy and his team made sure it came to fruition.  When I stood there, it was hard to believe that— he actually died before any of the parks were even build in Orlando—wow…

So I knew there were some lessons that not only I could learn, but that I could share with you… The one thing Walt was through and through was a salesman and here’s how he succeeded as one:

  1. Honesty- He was so honest and forthright and sincere, you couldn’t help but believe in him and his dreams. So how can you be more honest, sincere and forthright in your business?
  2. Enthusiasm– This is one I’ve got covered, when I’m enthusiastic about something it comes through my pores, people can see it written across my face and the same for Walt.  He was enthralled with his ideas and he was infectious and it was contagious, don’t ever forget that in your business.
  3. Confidence- Walt exuded confidence, even when his business was failing. It’s about having unrelenting faith in what you’re doing.  His confidence, like his enthusiasm was contagious and infectious.
  4. Courage- This is a big one- this biggest fear is the fear of failure and the fear of rejection, Walt faced this daily. After all his company was the first one to create cartoons as feature films, which was unheard of in Hollywood and his won his first of many Oscars for doing so.  His first cartoon feature film of Snow White, blew the critiques and audience goers away… He had courage for his vision and his belief in creating cartoons as feature films.
  5. Persistence– according to Walt, nothing that was worthwhile comes easy and he had to have perseverance and faith in his own abilities. So must you—don’t ever give up—or my favorite saying from my amazing Coach Debbie Phillips, (and Founder of Women On Fire) is “Don’t give up before the miracle.”

There are hundreds of more lessons to be learned from Walt Disney, I just hope you can grasp these few and implement them into your business and your life.
And don’t forget to tell me how you do!


What’s Holding You Back From the Success You Deserve?

April 26, 2012

This question I’ve been asked countless of times from coach’s, mentors, therapists, and many an event speaker. In fact, I just got back from listening to Larry Winget speak at the Glazer Kennedy Super Conference in Dallas and his approach was more like a baseball bat to the forehead, but I think it worked.  I know I GOT it- what he was saying… let me explain…

If you don’t know Larry he has several best-selling books out there- one called- Shut Up, Stop Whining & Get a Life, my other favorite is- You’re Broke Because You Want To Be. He has an interesting no holds bar approach to success and creating a better life for yourself. His approach for me was very refreshing and different from other personal development type folks out there.

The real thing that’s holding you back from your success is honestly, well— YOU!  I know that, I’ve known that about myself for a while.  If I don’t like my life, I have no one to blame but myself, I’ve created it. And I KNOW I will get a lot of people who won’t like this post, but guess what I’m ok with that.  I want people to either love me or not. I’m not crazy enough to want everyone to like me, I know that’s not possible, and I’m really ok with that.

So if you’re still reading—here’s a transformative exercise you can do right now to kick your success in high gear— Take about 20 mins and get out 3 sheets of paper.

  1. First piece of paper-  Write down where you are in your life right now—in specific areas like finance, physical, spiritual, relationships, business, etc.
  2. Next, write down where you WANT to be
  3. Last, write down what you have to GIVE UP in order get to where you want to be—

The real key here is STEP 3—Writing down what you will GIVE UP.  Most people create a plan of HOW they will get there, not realizing that they may need to give up some things in order to get where they want to go. This is how you will reach true success—giving up whatever is making your broke, unsuccessful, unhealthy, and whatever is keeping you from being financially successful.  This is huge.  Don’t want, do this exercise now and let me know your thoughts and how you do.  The last key is you have to really want success bad enough to do WHATEVER it takes to get there. Come join me, let’s do that in 2012 together!


Are You Hard Wired To Fail?

March 16, 2012

Do you ever set important goals and then find yourself really struggling and not being able to meet them?

I used to have MANY sleepless nights when I first started my business. I would freak out about where my next dollar was going to come from or how I’d finish a project or what to do about x, y and z, it was endless. Worry was taking over my life.  Until I was able to read some terrific books on worry and learn about ways that really helped stop me in my tracks and enabled me to push past my worry and fears to create more success for myself.  The thing is there was definitely something stopping me and a lot of times I had NO clue what it was.

Have you ever felt like something was stopping you? You may be right: your subconscious mind can influence in you subtle ways to keep you from achieving your goals!

Here’s how it works: when you experienced a challenging event as a child – even something as seemingly small as your third-grade teacher yelling at you for asking a question in class – your subconscious downloads the details of that moment and marks the memory with a trigger. It’s like there’s a trigger in your mind saying, “There’s trouble here!”

If a new event activates that trigger, the creative problem solving part of your brain shuts down – stripping you of all the resources and capabilities you should have. So you stop moving forward. And you may not even understand why you stopped because it isn’t a conscious decision. Your subconscious is the one that decided to shut you down.

Want more information about how past events affect current performance, even without you being aware of it? Join my friends and colleagues Jack Canfield (America’s Number One Success Coach and “Chicken Soup for the Soul” author) and Pamela Bruner (Business Success Coach and EFT tapping expert) for a free video, “Are you Hard-Wired You To Fail: What’s Stopping You From Succeeding.” Details here: http://tinyurl.com/6o3d3u3


The Productivity Secret That Will Change Your Life

February 23, 2012

One of the things I’m constantly struggling with: my plate is incredibly full. I just have way TOO many things on that proverbial plate and it’s constantly weighing me down.

I’m a Marketing Implementer, I help people get things done, and here I am, revealing to you my own challenges with getting things done.  Well, I’ve actually invested good money with experts to help me “organize” my office, my computer, and my life, as well as I got a new desk, bookshelves, and on an on. The interesting thing is after that expert gave me this “system” it wasn’t mine. So I had great difficulty in trying to use it and came across all sorts of obstacles that just reared their ugly heads a few weeks ago.

Before I tell you what happened, I actually would liken it to someone who’s trying to lose weight and just puts the weight back on—it’s because they’re not aligned somewhere with the process, or something just isn’t right.

Well that’s what I felt like, something with my new system just wasn’t jelling with me, it just wasn’t right. And unfortunately I didn’t really see that until the crap hit the fan last week and a few balls I was juggling just crashed—yikes—how did that happen?!

The cool thing is that I did ultimately find a solution, albeit painful to have to do soooo much learning—As Alex Mandossian has taught me—“You’re either winning or you’re learning!” No such thing as losing or making mistakes—my new lingo is “I’m learning.”

After the balls crashed last week, my wonderful client and mentor Alex Mandossian, pulled me aside and saw that I was obviously have some trouble and he got to the root of it very quickly and explained to me about “The Ivy Lee 6.”

In the early 1900’s consultant Ivy Lee approached Charles Schwab, President of Bethlehem Steel (not the investment company) and asked what it’d be worth to him if he could raise the productivity of his managers by at least 20%. Schwab didn’t have an answer but was definitely interested. This is where the “Ivy Lee 6” comes into play.  Ivy Lee taught him and his managers this proven technique.

Here’s THE productivity secret that will change your life:

Before you leave your office for the night, write down the 6 most important things to be done the next day and number them in order of importance. Prioritize.

Do the tasks from the most important to least important. I write these on index cards with the date at the top.  So have the card on your desk for the next day, and once you’ve finished one, take a highlighter (I like green) and highlight through it so that’s your sign it’s complete. Any unfinished tasks are rolled over to the next day.

It may sound incredibly simple, yet for me it was amazingly effective.  After my first week was done—oh my gosh, I had a stack of cards on my desks with lots of green on them. Just being able to visibly “see” what I’d done that week was psychologically empowering. I left my office Friday on a huge high…

The key is picking the 6 that will give you the most results for the day, and write them down very clearly. For example— Don’t say— “Call several people to connect with them about our product launch.”  This is better— “Call Susie to tell her about our product launch” or “Call 3 key people who will promote our product launch…”

Using the “Ivy Lee 6” also utilizes the power of prioritization and requires you to number your tasks in order of importance with your most important tasks done first.

Don’t wait, try this now— I know you will be amazed at how this works and leave me a comment and let me know how I can support you to be more productive!